An affair of the heart
by LilyRufus
Summary: I loved Bart Bass...RIP! But as a Rufly fan I have always wondered what would of happened If they had started an affair whilst she was married to Bart! Set after 3x06 THAT BLACK DRESS EPISODE
1. That Black Dress

This story starts from when Rufus gets home to the loft, after totally giving Lily THE LOOK when he turned up at her apartment and she was wearing THAT BLACK DRESS. He Is a guy so I cant blame him, and plus Lily was looking (in the TRUE words of Rufus) "whoahhhhh"

Rufus placed his keys on the side as he and Jenny entered the Loft, he could hear his son moving around in his bedroom, and he was aware that Jenny was mumbling something to him about her work, and usually he would feel bad for not paying attention to his kids but tonight was different. He had a blinding headache, couldnt focus on the simplest of things, and all he could think of was Lily and how amazing she has looked that night, infact he was finding it hard to erase the images of that dress out of his head! Rufus rubbed him temples and closed his eyes as the noises around him started to make his head throb

Jenny - " Dadddddd?" Jenny asked, suddenly irritated by the fact he was, and had been ignoring her since they left the upper east side  
Rufus - " Um?" he asked, squinting his eyes at her  
Jenny - " Why are you looking at me like that?"  
Rufus - " I have a headache" he said walking towards the kitchen pulling out his welcome back kotter mug, filling it with water and popping some asprin in a few swift motions  
Jenny - " Since when did you start getting headaches?"  
Rufus - " Um maybe around the time my only daughter started causing me grief"  
Jenny - " You had those grey hairs long before I started cutting school dad" she said grinning at him before picking up one of her fashion magazines from the side of the counter " You've been really quite and weird since we left Lily's, are you ok?"  
Rufus - " Yeah of corse I am, It's just been a tiring day thats all, I'm sure a goods night sleep will sort me out"  
Jenny - " Your tired? You spent the day watching me and a room full of people working like crazy, how can you be tired?" she asked laughing at him, Rufus gave her a half hearted smile before rubbing his temples again "It was kinda cool that Lily had my dress on, I mean I know I made that for Serena to wear but Lily always wears amazing clothes and she loved my dress, thats gotta be a good thing right?" she asked, not giving Rufus time to answer before she started talking again very fast, "Besides she looked amazing...In my dress...Myyyyy dress, and If someone like Lily loves my designs then who knows who else will, plus word of mouth is very important, all Lily would have to do is tell a few people at some event she's at about my designs, plus when Serena wears It the press will see her...as they always do of corse, and then those pictures could reach someone...like someone important... what do you think dad?... dadddddd?"

Rufus looked up at jennys questioning face, he was unsure what she was enquiring about but he did remember hearing her mention Lily looking great in her dress, infact that was the moment his mind had wandered...

Rufus - " Yeah Lily looked fantastic"  
Jenny - " I was actually asking what you thought about my designs being out there, but It's nice for any kind of response of you I guess"  
Rufus - " I'm sorry honey I'm just really tired, ummmm I'm going to have a lie down, work of this headache, then tomorrow I want to hear all about it ok?  
Jenny - " sure dad, see you In the morning" she said, looking confused at her father as he left the room

xoxo

Lily gave herself one last look In the mirror, running her hands down the side of her dress before slowly starting to unzip it. She stopped In her tracks as she heard the sound of the elevator open, she quickly zipped her dress back up and made her way out of the room, feeling a strange sense of dejavoo at the sight of Rufus

Lily -"Rufus, what are you doing here? Did Jenny forget something?" She asked quickly and directly, trying to mask the excitement in her voice of seeing him  
Rufus - " Thats what I told the door man downstairs at least" he muttered, smiling at her nervously

The room fell silent as they locked eyes

Lily - " Rufus...What are you doing here?" she reapted with a playfull tone this time, placing his hands on her hips raising her eyes at him  
Rufus - " Honestly? I'm not sure"

They fell into silence again as Rufus walked over to lily, she took her arms from her hips and folded them across her chest asif defending herself from Rufus

Lily - " Do you want a drink? Bart has about 6 different types of whiskey and that brand of scotch we use to drink, Premium liquor"  
Rufus - " I dont want a drink Lily" he said taking another step closer to her, causing Lily to take a step back to create some distance between them  
Lily - " Then what do you want?" She asked camly, sighing as Rufus looked away unable to give her an answer "Your going to have to help me Rufus" she said coldly starting to get annoyed  
Rufus - " Help you with what?"  
Lily - " You turn up tonight at my apartment unannounced with your daughter, you leave, then around 30 minutes later you turn up again with no explanation whatsoever, for the last time Rufus" she paused sighing heavily "What are you doing here?"  
Rufus - "Maybe I umm ... I"  
Lily - "You should leave" She commanded  
Rufus - "I know I should"

The room fell into silence once again as Rufus gave her an intense glare, Lily trying hard not to fall into the deep pools of his eyes yet again, they both knew that they should not be having this conversation, or even sharing a moment like this again, but no matter how hard they tried to fight It they found themselves stood across from each other In the most vulnerable way

Rufus- " I was at home" he started, closing his eyes and rubbing his temples again "And all I could think of was you Lily, after seeing you tonight In that dress, how amazing you looked It drove me crazy... Yoooouuuu continue to drive me crazy" he said, attempting a small smirk at her, Lily looking shocked at his honest declaration "I couldnt get YOU or that dress out of my head, from the moment I left this building I just wanted to turn around and leave Jenny somwhere and come back here to be with you"  
Lily - "Leave Jenny somewhere?" She asked pouting at him "Thats hardly responsible is it?"  
Rufus - " Maybe I'm sick of always trying to do the right thing" he said, causing Lily to break eye contact with him walking towards the kitchen, she quickly poured herself and Rufus a drink, downing her whiskey In one swift gulp before turning to Rufus again  
Lily - "So you decided to turn back?" she asked passing him his drink  
Rufus - " I had too"  
Lily - " And now that your here?" she asked curiously, watching him as he finished his drink placing his glass down on the table  
Rufus- " Now that Im here ... I dont think I can bring myself to leave"

lily walked away, breathing heavily running her hands through her hair, she turned to look at him quickly pleading with her eyes

Lily - "Rufus you have to leave, I mean it...GO NOW" she shouted the last part, feeling very desperate In this moment  
Rufus - "Lily" he said walking up to her, emotion etched all over his face  
Lily - "what Rufus?"

Tears formed in her eyes, she shook her head back trying to stop Rufus from seeing how close she was to crying, as she raised her hands to rub the tears from her eyes, Rufus grabbed her forcefully, holding onto her arms so she couldnt move away from him

Rufus - "Tell me to leave" Lily starts to mutter the words, Rufus pulling her closer to him so that they are almost touching "Just tell me to leave, look me In the eye and say It like you mean it, and I will head out this door and you never have to see me again" Lily shook her head violently as he said this  
Lily - "I dont want that Rufus, I dont want to not have you in my life ... I cant do that"  
Rufus - " I cant bear to see you with Bart, I cant pretend that It dosent kill me to not be able to touch you, or pretend that Im fully satisfied with us being friends Lily. I dont know, you might be, but Im not... because everytime I saw you I would feel like I was losing you again"  
Lily - " Rufus please..." she pleaded as rufus ran his hands up her arms resting them on her face, he stroked her cheeks gently resting his forhead on hers "I cant do this"  
Rufus - " You can do anything you want Lily"  
Lily - "I cant"  
Rufus - " Are you telling me you dont want this?" he asked cupping her chin in his hand lifting her face to stare at him  
Lily - " I didnt say that, I just think..."  
Rufus - " You know what our problem is Lil, we over think, we need to be spontaneous, let fate decide"  
Lily - " fate? You think all of this is fate?" She asked laughing sarcastically at him  
Rufus - " 20 years Lily, 20 years and I feel the same now as I did then, running into each other any chance we get, constantly finding reasons to be close to each other...Why fight this?"

Rufus moved his lips closer to her kissing her lips gently, lily cried out in response crumbling underneath him. He started leaving quick kisses on her face,  
letting his hands run down her side resting them on her hips pulling her closer to him. The heat picked up quickly as Lily grabbed the back of his head allowing her to intensify the kiss, she brought her leg up wrapping it around his body as Rufus wrapped his arms around her frame. Their passionate kisses turned into short intense ones as they locked eyes and smiled at each other, Rufus let his eyes travel down her body... at how her body looked In THAT DRESS

Lily - "Like what you see?" she asked seductively  
Rufus - " You know I do, theres only one thing I would like to see more" he commented, biting his lip staring down at the slit at the front of her dress. He kissed her with force, he slowly took his hands to the top of her dress starting to lower the fabric exposing her naked flesh. He took his eyes away from Lily and once again let them rest on her body, he sighed heavily as he let her dress fall of her shoulders, gradually lowering it so that her breasts were almost exposed to him, Lily grabbed his hands helping him pull her dress down, he bit his lip as the fabric was about to fall completely of her slim frame.

Rufus was suddenly pulled from his thoughts as he heard the voice of his daughter appear around him

Jenny - "Dad...Dad?" Jenny shouted, causing the image of Lily to disapear and Rufus to awake from his dream, Rufus jerked up, confused at where he was, It took him a few moments to realise where he was, and to register that his fantasty experience with Lily was EXECTLY that... a fantasy.

Jenny - " Dad, I was just checking to see If you were alright, you were mumbling like crazy, where you having a dream?"

Rufus laughed gently, running his hands through his hair, shifting up on the bed smiling at his daughter

Rufus - "One hell of a dream"

xoxo


	2. Another day

Hey guys, The next few chapters (or at least a HUGE LONG ONE) might be abit boring before the fun stuff starts to happen! I really want to set up how Lily &  
Rufus are feeling, & howbeing apart is treating them before I launch into a full blown affair, as I want to be true to the characters of rufly and make this seem real...

xoxo

Rufus set the breakfast bar with plates and glasses for his kids as he hurried around the kitchen, he had overslept due to the fact after THAT DREAM he couldnt close his eyes without thinking of Lily In THAT DRESS, and as he felt too pent up and aroused to fall back to sleep quickly he ended up trying to write a song, that ended up leaving him depressed and full of regret and anger (Not a good mix of emotions to be feeling at 2am In the morning!)  
He shook his head as he looked at his terrible excuse for waffles this morning ...thats It he thought ... the kids will know somethings up. Never had his superbe talents at waffle making been affected by a woman (Even when he found out that Allison had cheated on him, breakfast was made perfect each morning, on time and perfect enough to show the kids that no matter what troubles their parents were having, they could depend on at least one thing remaining constant...Waffles)  
He hated that Lily had that overwhelming emotional ( & judging by the effects of last nights dream) physical grasp on him, but at the same time he couldnt help but laugh at the fact they hadnt really changed in 20 years of knowing each other... Not deep down under the surface, or behind the masks they wore

Dan - " Morning dad", Dan called as he rushed into the kitchen throwing his heavy school bag on the side, " Have you moved that sheet Vanessa left here for us to sign?"  
Rufus - " what sheet?" he asked trying to salvage what was left of Jenny's waffle  
Dan - " She's doing something helpfull, keep an old building open or something ... She needs people to sign it at school"  
Rufus - " I havnt moved anything, did you ask your sister?" he said  
Dan - " She said she hadnt either, she also said I would need to be noticed at school for people to sign it though" he commented sarcastically  
Jenny - " That's a lie, since you dated Serena Van Der Woodsen that has edged you out of total anonymity, I actually said you would need to make some real friends to get the amount of signatures Vanessa needs" she said grinning at him as she took her place at the breakfast bar, " I'm starving, what's taking you so long dad?"  
Rufus - " Almost done" he said, hoping they wouldnt notice the fact breakfast was a disaster or the fact he hadnt showered yet that morning, he placed the waffles on his kids plates smiling at them largly before watching their reactions drop  
Jenny - why does my breakfast look like it's been In a fight and lost?"  
Dan - " And why does mine..." he started, staring at his food, fiddlying it around with his fork " I dont even have a witty comeback for this, I dont know how to describe this"  
Jenny - " This Is not your best work Dad..." she said shaking her head at him picking up the bowl of fruit to pour over her waffles  
Dan - " He must have something on his mind for ONE of only a handful of his talents to suffer like this"  
Jenny - " right, maybe you should fetch his guitar and see if he can still play some embarrasing songs from the 80's"  
Dan - " Though thats not necessarily the worst thing that could happen In the world"  
Jenny - " I would actually take bad breakfast's and take-out muffins if THAT SONGBOOK remained closed untill we moved out"  
Rufus - " Im stood right here guys" he said raising his hand up as Dan & Jenny took their eyes from their food onto him, laughing loudly with each other

xoxo

Lily walked towards her walk in wardrobe, running her hands through her hair as she yawned loudly. She had no idea why she was so tired, but she put it down to the fact that since Bart had left for his last business trip she hadnt been able to sleep the whole night through. He was expected home sometime around 2pm and she was genuinely excited for his return, since they had been married they had spent more time apart than together, usually that would'nt bother Lily in the slightest, infact she was use to it and knew what kind of man Bart was before she became his wife, but ever since they whole embarrassing Rufus drama the other week she was desperate for her husband to be home so that she could forget all about that... and Rufus! She was still quite upset that he had told her they couldnt be friends, but the more she thought about it she could understand his trepidations, she knew inside that if they were around each other that some kind of affair between them would start, and although she couldnt say that DIDNT excite her, it wasnt fair for anyone especially Bart!

Lily moved her hands through the extensive mound of clothes trying to find an outfit to show Bart what he had been missing, she pulled out a simple black short cocktail dress, that clung in at the waist and was held up by a beaded neckline, she smiled as she placed the dress down on the bed, not noticing when her bedroom door opened quickly and her daughter strided in

Serena " Hey mom" she said cheerfully, picking up the dress before placing it back down and flopping on the bed " Nice dress"  
Lily - " Its not too much?"  
Serena - " For what?" she asked getting comfy between the two large pillows on the bed  
Lily - " Barts home tonight and I wanted to wear something special for him, something almost enough to convince him to not take another trip for awhile"  
Serena - " Its perfect, Bart will love it"

Lily looked puzzled at her daughter sitting down on the side of the bed facing her

Lily - " with not a hint of sarcasim ... what have you done with my daughter?" she asked laughing as did Serena  
Serena - " I'm being honest, I can tell your excited for Bart being back and so can Eric, so I'm happy for you"  
Lily - " And the favour you need to ask follows...?" she said raising her voice at the same time she raised her eyebrows at her  
Serena - " Im offened that you think I cant take an interest In my OWN MOTHERS recent marriage without you jumping to the conclusion that I want something"  
Lily - " Im sorry sweetie, thats what happens when your daughter acts that way since the day she was born"

she commented playfully rubbing serena's leg, laughing when she saw Serena's shocked expression, which quickly turned into a huge smile

Serena - " Mom we can tell you miss having him around, even if YOOOUUUU wont say It, plus when he's home you wont be needing so many family nights will you?"  
Lily - " What are you talking about? You loved movie night"  
Serena - " And I will love it In the future, aslong as it only happens once every few weeks annnnnnd we get to take In turns who chooses the movies, thanks to Bart and not wanting to leave you home alone my social life has been effected this week"  
Lily - " Did Bart hire you as my babysitter? And here was I thinking my daughter would like to spend some quality time with me"  
Serena - " I do, I love it, you know I do mom... It's just a huge event, the event of the year, which I have been waiting for for soooooo long Is coming, the shows that I have been invited to for New York fashion week start tomorrow night and I really need to be there" She said with a pleading look in her eyes  
Lily - " I knew there was a sneaky agenda somewhere, let me guess, you want to stay out late each night this week even though you have school and college letters to look over?"  
Serena - " Yes, but Ive been thinking of some compromises we can come to together"  
Lily - " Compromises for both of us, or just your mother Serena?"  
Serena - " Listen up..." she said sitting up closer to lily so she could state her case "No drinks, No drugs, No boys, No clubs after 12"  
Lily - " That means plenty of clubs before 12 though?"  
Serena - " Nothing interesting happens before 12 mom"  
Lily - " Im pleased that the idea of Drugs, charged up boys and alcohol is your idea of interesting honey...You have to be home by 12, in bed for 12.15, I dont want ONE SINGLE phonecall in the middle of the night asking to sleep out at a friends, you come home alone and do not wake up the rest of the house, If I hear you have touched one drop of alcohol I will ask Eleanor to personally remove you from her seating chart, you will make time to finish your college letters of and study for your exams, and..."  
Serena - " And what?"  
Lily - " This is very important"  
Serena - "Anything"  
Lily - " Bring me back new season samples from all the designers" she said smiling at Serena  
Serena - " ABSOLUTELY" she said squealing with delight as she pounced at her mother " Thank you mom, I love you" she said hugging lily tightly kissing her face before squealing again Lily - " Now hurry up and get ready before your late for school"

Lily grinned as her daughter jumped of the bed, rushing out of the room full of excitment

xoxo

Jenny - " Are you still feeling sick Dad?" she asked taking a mouthfull of food and swallowing it down with her juice " It tastes better than It looks" she said looking at her brother and pointing at his plate  
Dan - " Since when do you get sick?"  
Rufus - " I was just feeling abit run down last night, plus I've only had a few hours sleep, maybe I'm stressed"  
Dan - " Work?" he asked, knowing that the look his father had on his face was clearly only to do with one thing... or person, after all he had shown a variation of this expression ever since she had married Bart Bass  
Rufus - " Oh you know, Its the Kids" he muttered grinning at them as he started tidying up the plates infront of him " So do you guys have plans tonight?"  
Jenny - " Nope" she said passing her plate to her dad, finishing her drink of and placing that in the sink  
Dan - " Me either"  
Rufus - " How about we pick a meal we havnt tried before and attempt to cook it together, like old times when you were little?"  
Jenny - "Is It that or let you make your famous chilli again?" she asked shooting Dan a scared look, Rufus puching her arm gently  
Dan - " Oh and judging by how his stress this morning affected breakfast I dont trust the chilli, I say he needs supervision"  
Jenny - " I agree, Its really irresponsible of you to let us go of to school on an empty stomach dad"  
Rufus - " You ate your waffles, even after all that moaning you did about how they looked"  
Dan - " What she's saying is that we usually go to school with a full stomach satisfied ready to learn, and today we just dont feel like that"  
Jenny - " And what with Dan's exams coming up..."

rufus dug into his pocket pulling out a few notes throwing them at Dan

Rufus - " There, get a muffin each on the way..." he said, grinning as both of us kids mumbled thank you and rushed out of the door

xoxo

Rufus buttoned up his shirt, giving himself a quick glance in the mirror before running his hand through his messy hair

"Another day" he thought to himself, before exhaling loudly

Lily applied a soft red lipstick to her lips, pouting in the mirror to make sure none had smudged on her teeth, she ran a comb through her hair and straightend her dress out in the mirror

"Another day " she thought to herself, before exhaling loudly


	3. Is Bart home

Lily heard the sound of the elevator open, wondering who it could be at this hour. She looked up from her magazine smiling as she saw Chuck stride into the apartment

Lily - "Charles, shouldnt you still be at school?"  
Chuck - " I had a free period, and I actually needed to speak to you Lily"  
Lily - " Sounds intriguing, and you brought coffee?" she asked eyeing up the two cups he was carrying along with his school bag  
Chuck - " I would of got us something stronger, but I know you'd frown upon It" he said smirking at her  
Lily - " You do have to be back in class this afternoon" she muttered

Lily smiled at him walking over to him, smiling as he passed her the cup of coffee

Lily - " Thankyou charles, you are aware that we have a machine that makes coffee in this apartment right?"  
Chuck - "Oh thats what that is" he muttered pointing at the state of the art coffee machine that had proberly been used less than five times since purchased  
Lily - "Who am I kidding, I have absolutely no idea how to use it" she said laughing gently following Chuck into the living area, taking a seat next to him on the couch  
Lily - " What did you need to talk about? Is it to do with Serena or Eric?"  
Chuck - " My father actually"  
Lily - " Do I wanna know what he's done...?" She asked, concerned at what could be so important that chuck would urgently need to speak to her, she had a sudden sense of worry as she looked into chuck's eyes, waiting for him to tell her something terrible about Bart  
Lily - " Is something wrong?"  
Chuck - " Oh dont worry, Its nothing mysterious. Infact I just wanted to know if you'd spoken to him today at all?"  
Lily - " I spoke to him last night, about 9pm, he said he was finishing up today, was about to order room service and would be home by tonight, why?"  
Chuck - " Oh..."  
Lily - " Charles?" she said smiling at him, edging him on with what was on his mind  
Chuck - " Its just, the other week I asked him for advice, which is a new thing for me and my father" He said grunting softly " With everyone at school talking about futures and colleges and whats next for them, I wanted some buissness advice of him. I've seen a few projects I'm interested In..."  
Lily - " I know you have, and so does your father" she said smiling proudly at him  
Chuck - " He actually spoke to you about that?"  
Lily - " Of corse" she said patting his leg gently " He's really proud of you Charles, you know that right?"  
Chuck - " No, no not really" he commented laughing gently  
Lily - " Well dont let him fool you, he couldnt be more proud" she said, chuck feeling genuinely touched "so whats the problem, has he rejected your plans?"  
Chuck - " No, he said he was going to be home early because one of the projects I'm interested In closes tomorrow, and I asked him if he would accompy me, I've tried calling him but everytime I do he's busy or In a meeting, I must of left 7 messgages already with wats her name..."  
Lily - " Thats what you get for choosing your fathers secretary, and not taking a proper look at their credentials, and her names Sarah..."  
Chuck - " I took a VERY good look Lily"  
Lily - " Not at her resume I assume"  
Chuck - "Ahh" he muttered causing Lily to laugh softly, she took a sip of her coffee watching Chucks face as she spoke  
Lily - " I will call him for you, I have a feeling an angry wife is more feared than a put out son"  
Chuck - " I appreciate It Lily, I'm going out after classes with a friend, what time should I come back here for dinner"  
Lily - " Ummm let's say 8?"  
Chuck - " I'll be here, thank you Lily, it means more than you know"  
Lily beamed at Chuck rubbing his shoulder gently as they smiled at each other

xoxo

Lily tapped her her fingers impatiently on the egde of Barts desk, she sighed as she heard the phone ring on the other side of the line

"Pick up, for god sakes what do we pay you for..." She muttered to herself, getting annoyed that Barts secretary couldnt pick up the phone

" Hi, Its Mrs Bass, I need to talk to my husband Is he available? No?... um, we'll could you tell him that he needs to call me and that It's important"

She sighed loudly, placing the phone down a little harder than she had planned too, hoping that he would'nt keep her waiting very long

xoxo

Jenny - " Are you eating that?" Jenny asked eyeing up a piece of chocolate cake that was on his plate, they had came to their usual place for dinner and no sooner had they sat down, Jenny was already eyeing up Eric's food ...  
Eric - " I will be, why dont you just buy a slice for yourself instead of taking of my plate?"  
Jenny - " Because I couldnt eat a full piece myself, share?"  
Eric - " Even If I said no you wouldnt listen, luckily I picked up two forks just incase"  
Jenny - " see, that's why YOU are my best friend Eric" she muttered smiling largly at him, taking a big forkful of his cake and stuffing it in her mouth Eric - " It's a good thing I'm gay, because that image right now would be enough to turn me of girls for life" he said laughing at her

Jenny covered her mouth, trying to swallow it fastly so that she could argue back with Eric. It took her longer than expected which only caused Eric to laugh louder. Once she had finished and wiped her mouth of with a napkin, she slapped him lightly across the head, using her other hand to knock his school books on the floor

Eric - " Its things like that which make me wonder why we are friends"  
Jenny - " To be fair, I'm the only one at school who really understands you, weeee are the perfect match..." she said nudging him gently, they shared a smile before Eric glanced down at the messy pile of books near his feet, he looked back up at Jenny pointing at the mess he had made

Eric - " Your picking those up right?" he asked, taking his ringing phone out of his pocket as Jenny groaned loudly, fetching down to collect the books from the floor, she piled them up neatly as she made her way through the rest of the cake, listening to Eric's phone call at the same time

"Hey Mom, Is everything ok? Yeah I'm fine, I'm just having dinner with Jenny... aha... Since when?... Oh ok then, are you ok?... You sure? Alright then mom, I guess I'll see you after school... Ok then, bye..."

Eric placed his phone back into his pocket, taking the fork beside him and taking a bite out of the desert as did Jenny

Jenny - " Your mom ok?" she asked,  
Eric - " Yeah, It's just Bart Isnt coming home and she had organised a big family gathering tonight to welcome him back... and now he has to stay out there" he muttered with a hint of disapointment in his voice, which Jenny didnt fail to pick up on  
Jenny - " There?"  
Eric - " I actually have no idea where there Is..."  
Jenny - "She mad?"  
Eric - " She didnt seem It... But you know with my mother It's kind of hard to know what she's feeling, she could be screaming inside, or be about to Murder someone and yet you wouldnt be able to detect the slightest hint of a early breakdown, the perfect illusion ey?"  
Jenny - " So is family night cancelled?"  
Eric - " She said she was going to have a bath and have an early night, so I guess that screws up my plans... I best tell Serena, though I dont think she'll be as put out as me, It took me hours to convince her to ditch a random party for family dinner time" he said, dragging out the word faammmmiiillly on purpose

Jenny could tell by the look on Erics face that beneath the sarcasim and smiles he wasnt as happy as he was letting on, she took a small bite of the cake before getting her phone out, sending a quick text before placing it down on the table smiling at Eric largly

Jenny - " You know tonight...My dad is doing an old humphrey dinner tradition with me and Dan..."  
Eric - " Does your family have a special Humphrey tradition for everything?"  
Jenny - " Pretty much... so?" she commented, rolling her eyes at Eric's confused expression " You wanna join in? I just texted my dad, and he said he would love an extra pair of hands to help tonight"  
Eric - " That means I... I would be cooking?"  
Jenny - " Or chopping, or opening cans and pouring the drinks out, though the second one is usually Dan's job, so I'm not sure how mad he would be for you to come and take over his all important role"  
Eric - " For someone whose Mother cant even boil an egg, I do know my way around a kitchen, I have skills... they may be limited but..."  
Jenny - " Why would your Mom need to know how to boil an egg? Dont you pay people to do those kinds of things?"  
Eric - " Ive never even seen my Mom in the kitchen before, the image of her and Bart In matching aprons making breakfast Is just...Distrubing"

Eric shook his head, trying to get the image out of his mind, looking up at Jenny and laughing as he saw her amused expression looking back at him

Jenny - " Does your mom really not know how to boil an egg?" She asked, confused at how someone could not know how to do this simple task that her mother had taught her at a young age, infact she knew how to make or at least help make alot of things, thanks to the fact the Humphreys loved cooking together

Eric - " I remember this one time... when me and Serena were tiny...In between husbands" he said, Jenny laughing softly " She was determined to make a proper meal for me and Serena, she went out and bought the best ingrediants she could, she spent an hour preparing it all, then cut to a few hours later and I thought she was about to scream and start punching things, she got so stressed and made the nanny finish it of... Turns out she couldnt work the oven, since then she has came to the conclusion that HIRE HELP OR STARVE"

Jenny laughed loudly as did Eric

Jenny - " So you'll come tonight? Pleaseeeeee Im begging you"  
Eric - " I would love to"

xoxo

Lily had just took a long bath and was finally feeling more relaxed, Bart had called her back and they had spent almost 3 minutes on the phone before he gave her the line

" Im sorry, I have to go, I'll call you as soon as the meetings finished"

she wasnt holding out much hope of that...

She brushed the hair out of her face, spinning around as she saw her son enter her room, she gave him a large grin before examing his outfit he had chose

Lily - " Cute shirt honey" she said, eric let out a small sigh as he noticed her mood seemed to have lifted, when he came home she was banging things around and he has stayed In his room incase she started throwing things at the wall  
Eric - " Thanks mom, I know I promised I wouldnt ask again buuuut are you sure you dont want me to stay In with you tonight? We can have some mother son time, watch a movie, get some food In"  
Lily - " That sounds wonderful, but I'm really not in the bonding mood tonight, I dont think Im going to be fun company. Plus you know you'll have much more fun with Jenny and her family"  
Eric - " Thats True..." he said, grinning as his mother gave him a less than amused stare " Im joking, I just dont wanna leave you home alone when your In one of your crazy moooods"  
Lily - " My moooooods?" She asked

Lily perched herself on the end of the bed, Eric folding his arms and raising his eyes at her which causes her to groan dramatically and run her hands through her damp hair

Lily - " I hate how you always know me so well" she said, pretending to be annoyed at him  
Eric - " Mom, there has to be someone, one person out there that understands when you are about to scream and knows how to clear the room, or understands why you act so crazy all the time, your lucky It's me and not Serena who has this gift, because she kinda judges everything that you do"  
Lily - " I agree with that" Lily muttered loudly " I just have no idea how you do it... "  
Eric - " You sure your feeling ok?"  
Lily - "Im fine honey... I was annoyed untill I realised I married Bart Bass and that I should of prepared myself for this a long time ago" she said, giving him a half-hearted laugh before getting up and hugging him, " Im fine, I just want this family to be together, I really want this to work"  
Eric - " I know you do Mom"  
Lily - "Now go, your gonna be late..."  
Eric - " Call me If you need me" he said, Lily nodding at him, kissing his cheek gently " Love you"  
Lily - " Love you too honey" she called after him as he left the room

xoxo

Lily poured herself a glass of wine, looking around the big empty house before sighing loudly. The ringing of her phone brought her back to reality as she rushed over to answer it. She took her cell phone out of her back pocket, staring at the caller I.d on the screen

RUFUS CALLING

she contemplated not answering the phone, but of corse the fact her son was there plus her curiosity meant that she answered it, though she did leave it ring for awhile before she casually spoke into the speaker...

Lily - " Hello"  
Rufus - " Hey Lil..."  
Lily - "Rufus, this Is a surprise" she said, making an effort not to sound too happy to hear his voice, even though she couldnt deny how happy she felt when she saw his name appear on her phone, she hoped that Rufus wouldnt be able to tell this in her voice. Rufus paused sighing loudly, causing a wave of sickness to hit Lily's stomach  
lily - " Is Eric there, Is he ok?"  
Rufus - " He's fine"  
Lily - " Good, you had me worried for a second"  
Rufus - " That wasnt my intention I promise"  
Lily - " It's not your fault... I just ummm...feel a bit"  
Rufus - " On edge?"  
Lily - "Yeah" she muttered a small heart hearted laugh  
Rufus - "Stressed?"  
Lily - " Ive been calmer, though Its nothing a bottle of wine and a soak in the bath wont fix...why are you calling?"  
Rufus - " I umm, I guess I just wanted to see how you were doing"  
Lily - "Im good, thank you for asking"  
Rufus - " Im pleased to hear that Lily"  
Lily - " How are you doing?"  
Rufus - " Good, really good thanks"  
Lily - " Im glad"  
Rufus - " Me too"

The atmosphere between them was tense, neither of them really knew what to say to each other, and every sentence spoke felt forced and uncomfortable. Lily was still in a bad mood since her conversation with Bart, and the fact Rufus was acting in this way just caused her to become MORE irritated than ever

Lily - " Is that all?"  
Rufus - " How do you mean?"  
Lily - " Is there anything else you wanted to know Rufus?...Maybe what I ate for lunch? What Im doing now? Or what Im wearing perhaps?"

Rufus groaned at her sarcasim, although he knew she had every right to be mad at the fact he was calling her after what he had said last week

Lily " Im sorry for my tone, I am, but forgive me for feeling a little confused here Rufus, as of a few minutes ago I was under the illusion that we couldnt even be friends, yet alone share a phone call"  
Rufus - " I know"  
Lily - "I mean thats what you said right?"  
Rufus - " I did say that"  
Lily - " And you seemed to mean it... "  
Rufus - " At the time I did, I guess"  
Lily - " I GUESSED THAT when you were rushing me out of the door Rufus" she attempted a half hearted laugh to mask how upset that had made her, but her words came out high and shaky  
Rufus - " I didnt throw you out of my house Lily"  
Lily - " Well you made it clear I wasnt welcome"

Silence...

Lily - "Rufus" She sighed loudly "Honestly you dont need to explain yourself, like you said, Im married, we have this complicated history that should of never" she stutterd trying to find the right words to say " Its called a past for a reason, and you are...seeing someone?" she said sounding more like a question rather than a comment  
Rufus - " I didnt want you to find out like that"  
Lily - " Its none of my buissness Rufus, Im happy for you. You deserve...Lets just forget about everything ok? Goodnight Rufus"  
Rufus - " Wait, wait dont hang up"  
Lily - " What else is there to say?"  
Rufus - "What um, what are your plans for tonight?"  
Lily - " Tonight? Why?" she asked confused at why he was asking such a question after everything that had been said  
Rufus - " Would it kill you to answer one simple question for me Lil?"  
Lily - " I told you, a bottle of wine and a bath, the kids are all out so Bart and I can have some peace and quiet together" she lied twisting a loose strand of hair in between her fingers, glad that Rufus couldnt see her, and he would of picked up on this and known she was lieing in a second  
Rufus - " Oh he's home is he?"

Rufus asked smiling largly, amused that Lily found herself having to lie to him when he knew that Bart wasnt home at all, as Eric had already shared this imformation with him  
Lily - " Yes, infact he plans on staying home for the long term now"  
Rufus - " Thats nice for you, and the kids of corse! So Bart is there now, with you, whilst your on the phone to me?"  
Lily - " He's just quickly unpacking upstairs" she muttered through gritted teeth, unsure why she felt the need to lie at all  
Rufus - " And what do you and Bart have planned alone tonight?"  
Lily - " You wanna know what my husband and I have planned when we have an empty house?"  
Rufus - " You mean Bart can still" Rufus asked trying to hold in the giggles he was supressing at that moment  
Lily - " I dont see how thats any of your buissness Rufus"

At that moment Rufus burst out laughing, unable to hold it in anymore

Lily - "Whats going on?" she asked, getting agitated and annoyed at Rufus's teasing  
Rufus - " Eric told me Lil"  
Lily - " Told you what?"  
Rufus - " About how tonight was meant to be a family night to welcome Bart home, but once again he had a meeting and had to stay..."  
Lily - " You knew all along?"  
Rufus - " A ha"  
Lily - " All through that terrible story I was making up?"  
Rufus - " For my benefit yes"  
Lily - "Then why the hell did you let me continue?"  
Rufus - " I wanted to see how far you could go, sadly the image of Bart caused me to loose my cool" he said, still laughing at her  
Lily - " Your an idiot"  
Rufus - " Yeah"

Rufus smiled at the fact he could now hear Lily's beautiful laugh on the other side of the phone

Lily - " Well now you know, the kids are all out having fun, my husbands somewhere In the country, and Im sat here with a glass of wine making up lies to you so that I dont seem so pathetic, which despite all that is how Im feeling right now. So please dont make me feel any worse than I already do"  
Rufus - "I dont intend to, Its only fun embrassing you when I can actually see the look on your face"  
Lily - " That dosent help Humphrey, You never did tell me why you called"  
Rufus - " I called because we have too much food here, a family member of yours, and an empty chair at the table"  
Lily - " Your inviting me to dinner at your house...?"  
Rufus - " Well it wouldnt be the first time"  
Lily - " I dont think thats such a good idea Rufus"  
Rufus - " Come on. I promise you I wont embarrass you untill the kids are out of earshot"  
Lily - " As tempting as that offer is, and IT IS! I told Eric what Im going to tell you...Im really not in the mood for company tonight"  
Rufus - " You seem pretty sociable to me"  
Lily - " Thats only because you made me laugh"  
Rufus - " I have a few jokes up my sleeve for dinner?"  
Lily - " Then I'll be sure to make Eric reapet them to me when he arrives home tonight"  
Rufus - " Hey, I only know a few jokes. I like to save them for each person I see face to face"  
Lily - " Then maybe you can tell me them next time we bump into each other"  
Rufus - " I cant persuade you? Theres nothing I can say to make you change your mind?"  
Lily - " No Rufus"  
Rufus - "Well I tried, If you change your mind you know where we are"  
Lily - " Goodnight Rufus"  
Rufus - " Goodnight Lil"

Lily sighed as she switched her phone of. Smiling at how even a 5 minute conversation with Rufus could make her day that much better! She wondered if she should of said yes to his offer, and was it too late to throw away her principles and just admitt that she did infact want to have dinner with him! She shook these thoughts out of her head, remembering how it had felt last week to see Rufus with another women, knowing that she could not go through that again. She stood up, taking her glass of wine with her as she walked up the stairs to her bedroom, hoping to sleep some of her troubles away


	4. Are you awake

__

Hi Rufus, are you still awake? How are you?

Lily wrote out and deleted each letter one by one, hoping to have the courage to send the messages as she read them back. It was 11.05pm and she couldnt sleep, and for some reason she had been staring at her phone hoping that Rufus would message her, asif he would be able to sense her unease at that very moment. She sighed as she placed her phone down on the bedside table, picking it up once more ready to finally send the message, before shaking her head deciding that that would be a very bad idea. It had been almost 2 weeks since Lily had last spoken to Rufus, 2 weeks since Eric had came home all happy after his fun night at the Humphrey's and left Lily wondering if she should of took Rufus up on his offer, afterall it was just dinner...

Nothing was that simple when It came to her and Rufus

Bart had came home the day after bearing gifts as his way of an apology, although she was genuinely happy to have her husband back home, and touched at his attempts since then to spend more time at home with the family. She couldnt hide the fact that her mind was constantly elsewhere, somewhere it shouldnt be, thinking of the one person that she swore she would try and forgot when she became Mrs Bart Bass...

RUFUS

Lily knew It wasnt going to be easy, he was never easy to get over! Not 20 years ago, and definitely not now! The moment he had stepped back into her life she had tried to pretend that it didnt effect her, that it didnt terrify, scare, worry and excite her all at the same time...But It did! The fact they had spent a passion filled night together before her wedding to Bart hadnt helped, she had almost forgotten how his skin felt against hers, how wondeful he was at making her feel like the most beautiful woman in the world, how much passion and lust they had always had for each other, and how incredible they made each other feel each time they held one another in their arms...

She loved Bart, she really did! He was good to her and the kids and she knew how lucky she was to have a strong, powerful man who loved her and wanted to look after her. Though for the last few weeks she couldnt shake the deep feeling of regret and WHAT IF'S from her mind. This scared and confused Lily, as she knew that around Rufus she could loose controll of her desires and emotions in a heartbeat, and yet here she was, ready to deceive Bart by contacting Rufus of all people

Bart didnt deserve that, and neither did Rufus, she had messed him around for too long, she had hurt him, she had seen the look in his eyes on her wedding day, similar to the look he gave her when she had walked out on him in their youth, broken hearted because of her

Lily was never going to leave Bart like Rufus desperately hoped for...

_Hi  
Are you still awake?  
I miss you xx_

Lily wrote out quickly without hesitating, hitting the send button, hoping that the reply would put her mind at ease  
Lily sighed quitely, secretly wishing she had sent that message to Rufus and not to her husband...


End file.
